Maree’s Musings

IF IT AIN’T BROKE … IT SOON WILL BE

Remember December? And that consuming desire to buy stuff – with its parallel term ‘consumer’. New ‘toys’ are not restricted to Xmas or the kids; it’s my guess that all of us are guilty of hankering for an upgrade of possessions of some sort – whether it’s the latest model flat-screen TV or a cellphone that does everything but the dishes (and possibly can be programmed to sort that, too.) The stores or your screen are awash with cunning invitations to cajole you into that must-have.

One interesting spin-off from this, though … the acquisition of more gear can get messy, and unless one lives in a home the size of a rugby field, eventually something’s gotta give. It’s difficult to find a home for those old-fashioned but still functional items; and being part of a throwaway society still rankles with some.

HAH!! Today’s manufacturers have devised a plan to assuage their customers’ guilt pangs. It’s called PLANNED OBSOLESCENCE: a rather impressive sounding term meaning ‘having a policy to create products with a limited useful life’. Vance Packard, in 1960, writes “the systematic attempt of business to make us wasteful, debt-ridden, permanently discontented individuals”. Charming!
Clever boffins design stuff either to break before they should, or simply to go out of fashion. Either way, items become obsolete. The rationale? Obvious. The hapless consumer is soon back to the shop for more [in the trade, politely called ‘shortening the replacement cycle’.] It’s a sad fact that researchers found that the only item built in America designed to last was a piano!

My first car was a Morrie Minor. Not new, nor a replacement for something that had died, either. When the gearbox fell ill, we simply pulled it apart, did some tinkering with the innards according to the ‘manual’, bolted it back together, and Morrie went merrily on her way for many more miles. Nowadays, we have no idea how things work. And when they clap out, it’s yet another purchase of the ‘latest thing’.

Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but over time I’ve developed a certain fondness for old stuff. Here’s a poem I wrote – in 2008! – about an ageing appliance of mine. 2017: it’s still in working order!!

THE TOASTER
My toaster’s on its last slice,
I think. Just about
done for.
It’s nothing special – just an
ordinary two-slice basic model.
The chrome’s a bit corroded; and
when I look in, there’s a sprinkle
of charred crumbs stuck inside.
Still, it’s been here for ages;
years and years
in the kitchen, keeping company
with the kettle and the coffee cups,
standing sentinel, silent, by the stove.
Uncomplaining, popping out
one slice every day, day in, day out;
regular as clockwork.
But one day soon its time will come
I guess –
something will go [or stop]
and I’ll say goodbye; consign
my toaster to the kitchen in the sky;
take myself off to Briscoes,
or some up-market ‘kitchen place’
and buy a sleek new model.
Yet somehow
in a strange nostalgic sort of way
it won’t be quite the same.